Mouse or Elephant?, 2

A bit of a collection of recent rants - specifically about being gay, in the military (or like field), where gay isn't wanted:

Why did I go into the military?

[x] Parents divorced
[x] Living situation sucked
[x] No money for college
[x] Grew up fast and learned a lot

All of the above here.

I would never undo my time in the military. I learned too much, grew a lot as a person - and met some of my truest friends. BUT, I can't imagine having enlisted for another 4 yrs.

Making sure you have a strong ring around you is important.

I guess - you just have to find a group of folks that can be balanced and impartial - yet, at the same time give a gentle nudge, slap or kick as needed when you're feeling low.

My friends and family have always provided - in abundance.

As for the 'why did you enlist?', 'why do you stay?', 'have you lost all sense of reason and dignity?' type questions and comments: PIFFLE.

These are the questions you are strapped with already. Folks either have to be open to the fact you are there - or - well, zip it.

Whether the military is the most choice place to be as a homosexual or not - but for bending the rules, but for breaking into areas where folks would prefer you just don't go - it just holds everybody down.

There are so many things that someone has to do - and someone might be gay or straight - and if someone gay goes into the military, and succeeds daily despite all of the weight and obstacles that can trip that person up - don't knock that person down.

Salute them. Support them.

Some folks seem to find it incredibly easy to say - 'it's all or nothing' - come out or keep quiet.

A quote from one such folk:"What I am saying is that you are not powerless over your situation.

You have choices, and as always there is a consequence to every choice. Its life."

And as such - a person has the right to ask for help and support from other folks.

If the idea is that no one should ever approach something that's unattainable - or that a person should only do the things that allow them to be who they want to be, when they want to be, without any 'filtering' or without any weight for the consequences of their actions, what a friggin' scary place the world would be. Or may be becoming.

I would ask these free-wheeling folks, what is your life experience - your age, what you do for a living, where you live, etc. Those things have an impact on how you relate to the world. And may make it very black & white for you with regards to your sexuality.

One of the things I sometimes find perplexing about change in society is how slowly and then quickly and then slowly it occurs. And how sometimes it occurs without people realizing it. And sometimes it takes very sudden and unexpected slides backwards.

SO - that so many folks today can say they are out - to spoon in theatres, to check out other guys in malls, etc. - how many gay people in the previous generation(s) had to filter, had to slip into roles that required a little alteration of personality - and then had to come out to the right people at the right time?

And how about those who remain firmly in place on 'fronts' where they were unexpected, undesired, or not permitted - silent and waiting: agents of change.